Caregivers

Coping Through a Crisis

(Editor’s note: In the print edition of Quest Issue 1, 2020, Sarah Clark-Stoney, MSW, LSW, was misquoted. Her quotes have been clarified here, and updated in the full, downloadable PDF version of Issue 1, 2020.) Fifteen years ago, my family lived through Hurricane Katrina in Louisiana. At the time, our son was a freshman in high school. Falling pine trees and rain destroyed half of our home. Rebuilding took seven months, and we lived in the chaos during the process.

The Independent Mindset

After Sandra Young was diagnosed with late-onset Pompe disease at age 52, she thought her life would change and she would no longer be able to do the things she enjoyed.“While my friends and family were living their lives, I was sitting on the sidelines missing out,” Young says. “It took me a year to realize I am the same person as before. I hit a stumble in the road, and it shouldn’t stop me from doing the things I want to do. I woke up and thought, ‘Girl, you can still do it, you just have to do it differently.’”

Opening Doors

Three mornings a week, Karen Toenniss, 50, grabs the car keys and dashes off to her part-time position as coordinator for the MDA ALS Care Center at Houston Methodist Hospital. Nestled in her heart, she carries her husband’s memory. “Every time I save someone even a little bit of frustration as they deal with ALS, it feels like Mike is with me,” she says.

Caregiving: Choosing with Care

Amid the wave of anxiety and emotion that can accompany living with a neuromuscular disease, Bill and Sharon Sumner saw a few things clearly the day they learned of Sharon’s ALS diagnosis. “I knew we would keep her at home, and I knew I would be the one to take care of her,” Bill says. The Sumners were in a prime position to make such choices. Having sold his successful manufacturing business, Bill had the time to devote to his wife and the money to hire personal care attendants (PCAs) as her condition progressed. But for many families, when a diagnosis is made or a disease progresses to the point where daily care is needed, the decision isn’t as clear-cut. Financial means, work schedules, family dynamics and the extent of a support system are among the many factors that go into planning in-home care.

Caregiving: Task Masters

“The proper equipment helps reduce fatigue because it decreases the energy required for a routine task,” says Teri Krassen, an occupational therapist at the MDA Care Center at Good Shepherd Rehabilitation Hospital in Allentown, Pa. Health care professionals at MDA Care Centers can provide guidance in selecting products, train clients and their caregivers to use them, and give advice on individual issues or answer questions. According to Krassen, the best products help an individual and their caregiver find a balance between how much they can do independently and the amount of support needed from the caregiver. Some products allow individuals to be more self-sufficient, which can boost self-confidence and promote better relationships with caregivers.

In Good Hands

All parents need time to themselves, but for BJ Mirabile of Winchester, Mass., finding child care for her daughter Katie, who has spinal muscular atrophy (SMA), often proved difficult. “When she was younger, we had some neighborhood sitters and sitters through early intervention,” Mirabile says. But early intervention services are for babies and toddlers with developmental delays or disabilities. Now Katie is older, and she uses a power wheelchair, BiPAP (bilevel positive airflow pressure) machine and MIC-Key gastric feeding tube.

The Heart of Care

When a couple vows to share their lives — whether or not they express that commitment before an authorized officiant — there’s a traditional phrase that holds particular pertinence when one partner is both mate and primary caregiver for the other. It’s the line about loving one another for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.

From Self-Denial to Self-Acceptance

I was diagnosed with spinal muscular atrophy (SMA) at 18 months. I was pretty fortunate that my doctors said that I looked strong, and the quality of my life would be determined by every milestone I surpassed. However, they couldn’t foresee how I’d react to my own disability throughout life. When I was young, all I wanted was to be what I considered “normal” or “typical.” I wanted to be like everyone else. With that said, I was blessed with two parents and other special people in my life who always told me I was beautiful, I could be anyone I wanted to be, and my disability never had to define me because I could define it. But my own voice said differently.

My Brother's (or Sister's) Keeper

In a small Detroit apartment, Sam Barash, 32, lives with and cares for his 20-year-old, soon-to-be 21, sister, Angela Barash, who is living with myotonic muscular dystrophy and myasthenia gravis. For a year now, Sam’s been his sister’s primary caregiver, waking her every four hours for medication, fixing her meals, helping her get dressed and doing everything possible to make Angela comfortable.

Caring for the Caregivers

“If I was down, who was going to take care of him?” This question nagged at Josie Rose of Texas, as a lingering bout with the flu kept her from taking care of her husband, Rick, who at the time was living with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS). The flu that laid her flat also opened her eyes. She realized that she couldn’t do it all for him, not all the time anyway. So she finally asked their four adult children for help, and they began to pitch in. Their only question for Josie was, “How have you done all this by yourself?”

MDA Resource Center: We’re Here For You

Our trained specialists are here to provide one-on-one support for every part of your journey. Send a message below or call us at 1-833-ASK-MDA1 (1-833-275-6321). If you live outside the U.S., we may be able to connect you to muscular dystrophy groups in your area, but MDA services are only available in the U.S.

Our Story

Our Team

Resources

Care Centers

Family Seminars

MDA Resource Hub

Summer Camp

Our Approach

For Researchers

For Clinicians

Participate

Donate

Partner